Threats to safety come in various forms, levels

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The day after the New York tragedy, I was on the phone with a young father who was recounting vividly and emotionally all the sights, sounds, reports, opinions, conjectures and analyses of same that he'd seen and heard on TV. He was quite upset, and it surprised me. In all the years I'd known him, he'd impressed me as an unusually calm, intelligent, confident person. I'd never once seen him show any real uncertainty or fear about anything. |ret||ret||tab|

He paused, and I remarked, "You seem really upset."|ret||ret||tab|

Silence. Then, as if surprised himself at the realization, he said, "Yes. Yes, I guess I am. You know, I don't feel safe now. I've always felt safe. I guess this is the first time in my life I've ever felt like everything could be taken away."|ret||ret||tab|

I'd forgotten how upsetting, on a very primal level, certain events can be, those that can rob us of the feeling of safety.|ret||ret||tab|

It's easier for older people. At 61, I'm old enough to remember World War II. In my mind's eye I can still see my father walking out the door of our little house on North Robberson Avenue to go to war. It was 1943. He was 28 years old. I was 3. |ret||ret||tab|

My parents explained the war to me, so I understood, even at 3, that there were people in this world who would murder others in order to take everything away from them. I also understood what it was to not know from day to day whether these people would win the war.|ret||ret||tab|

Mostly I understood the war in terms of my father not being there and the possibility that he might not ever be there again. As it was, the murderers didn't win, and my father did come home. (I remember that scene too, my mother and I meeting him at the old Frisco Depot on Main.)|ret||ret||tab|

I think all of us who, however young, were alive during World War II were tempered by it. I suspect we all grew up with an underlying sense that the people and things we love can suddenly be taken away. Call it insecurity if you like, or wisdom, but we would never be as surprised by war or other loss as those who didn't know the World War II.|ret||ret||tab|

There must be a clinical name for the sudden loss of security precipitated by events. I remember experiencing it with the McCarthy hearings in the early '50s, evil of a different sort, as a man who was supposedly one of our leaders destroyed other men's careers and lives with lies. And I certainly remember the sudden insecurity and fear that followed the assassinations of John Kennedy, Martin Luther King and Bobby Kennedy. |ret||ret||tab|

Most revealing, however, was the earthquake in San Francisco in 1989. I was there, and I can tell you that an earthquake, a bad one, one that lasts, say, 20 seconds and throws you off balance as the earth twists and heaves and you want it to stop but it doesn't, robs you of the most fundamental security of all, the feeling of being anchored to the planet. |ret||ret||tab|

When that goes, when you can't even count on that one, it's scary to the max, and the repercussions can come back to haunt you for weeks, months or even longer.|ret||ret||tab|

The sudden ripping away of one's sense of safety can have many effects: anxiety, sleeplessness, and sadness; irritability, sometimes to the point of angry outbursts; general hypersensitivity, difficulty concentrating, worry, fatigue, restlessness, and forgetfulness. Tears can come without any apparent reason, and one can be overcome with feelings of powerlessness. At worst, a person can even come to despair, to the sense that life has no meaning.|ret||ret||tab|

The good news is, it doesn't last forever. We can, do, and will adjust to the most extraordinary adversity. We do it not only by will, but by our very biology. Consider that each of us represents the end of a chain of millions of years of evolution designed for survival. Nature wants us to be healthy. Give it time, and, all things being equal, we will heal.|ret||ret||tab|

I've watched little TV about the New York tragedy. There's a point at which watching just becomes wallowing in it, I think. Too, I don't need to subject myself to much of other people's misery to get the point. Right now I prefer to follow the advice of Rudy Giuliani and others that the best thing we can do is get on with our lives.|ret||ret||tab|

On the whole I haven't been too shaken by the events in New York. Stunned, yes. Appalled, yes. Profoundly moved, yes. But not disoriented. Not frightened. I am older. Earlier experiences have softened the blow. I have also seen America survive too much. I know too well this marvelous American spirit.|ret||ret||tab|

Well, no one reading this paper needs me to remind them about the American spirit. You live it every day. |ret||ret||tab|

Be well.[[In-content Ad]]