SATIRE: Wal-Mart looks to sell marijuana in Colorado, Washington

The world’s largest retailer is looking for new ways to push profits higher. And dudes, its plan is killer.

Bentonville, Ark.-based Wal-Mart Stores Inc. announced it plans to begin selling marijuana in both Colorado and Washington, where recreational use has been legalized, according to reporting by the National Report.
 The company, which is known to go to great lengths to save money, also is working with federal law enforcement and regulatory agencies to establish three industrial-sized marijuana production facilities in Colorado.

The megaretailer – which wants to sell the drug in varying amounts as well as dope-based baked goods and paraphernalia – plans to invest $420 million into those production facilities over the next six years and estimates annual profits at nearly $2.3 billion.

Read more from the National Report.