Rusty Saber: Office technology breeds sophisticated slackers

Joe McAdoo is former chairman of the communication department at Drury University.

Technology has changed just about every aspect of our lives. I didn't realize how profound the changes were until I read about the very latest in high-tech methods of making it look like you are working when you are not. Put another way - Goofing off.

I suppose that from the time humankind began to walk upright, there has been a need for some sort of work to obtain life's essentials. Probably the art and science of looking busy while goofing off began at the same time. Until the coming of the computer age, goofing off was mostly "no-tech." I'm not talking about primitive measures such as workers leaning on their shovels or loafing around the water cooler. A somewhat more sophisticated, yet effective no-tech gimmick was to simply look busy.

As I recall, one could get away with a lot of goofing off by striding with purpose, with a look on the face that cried out, "I'm on my way to do something very important!" This no-tech method was greatly enhanced by carrying a clipboard. The determined-looking-clipboard-carrier, who periodically wrote something down, was a powerful force in the olden days of no-tech goofing off.

It goes without saying the clipboard maneuver isn't well-suited for one stuck in an office or cubicle. No-tech office measures might have included leaving a light on in the office with a coat hung over the back of a chair while the person is actually goofing off. One of the most persistent no-tech methods has always been to tell everyone, including the boss, just how long and hard the slacker has been working.

According to a recent article in The Wall Street Journal, these methods are as archaic as the leisure suit.

Computer gadgets that bring the world to your fingertips can also bring to your fingertips the ability to appear on the job without actually being there.

The WSJ article describes a Denver tech support worker who has installed a program on his hand-held computer that enables him, while enjoying a three-hour lunch in a restaurant, to manipulate his office computer, making it appear he has just stepped away from his desk.

Before demanding to know the exact methodology so you can use it to goof off, please understand that he was eventually fired for, among other things, taking three-hour lunches.

Anything new must have a new name. The WSJ article says psychologists (I don't know if that means all, some or only one psychologist) call it "impression management."

Recent e-mail advancements have taken goofing off to new heights. E-mail timers make it possible to program messages to be sent anytime of day or night, making it appear the diligent employee is working while all others are at rest.

The WSJ article reports on one employee who arranged for work-related messages to be sent to his boss at 3 a.m., which seems to me to be a high-tech version of the no-tech gambit of telling the boss how hard you work.

Some serious goof-off proponents have figured out how to make it appear they were at their office computer when they were nowhere near it. And one can send e-mail messages from anyplace, but it will appear in the same format as the sender's office computer. For instance, you could be living it up on a cruise ship in the Caribbean, cranking out e-mails that seem to be from your office. Leaning on a shovel was never like this.

Call forwarding has long enabled folks to appear to be answering workplace telephones when they are otherwise occupied. Add new computer advances and you have the ingredients for goofing off in ways that slackers of yesterday could not have envisioned.

A fascinating consequence of high-tech goofing off is some bosses are using impression management. Those who do it say they want to make it appear they are in the office when they aren't, sending work-related messages at late hours. This is to suggest employees should work equally as hard.

Sounds to me like a game of "you con me, I'll con you."

As for me, I'll do my goofing off with a clipboard