Opinion: Hilton nonsense eats up news time

It was a five-minute network radio news program. One would think that the lead story would be the most important piece of news at the time. This newscast didn’t lead with politics, the war on terror, international relations or economics.

No. In somber tones, the newsperson reported that Paris Hilton had been released from a Los Angeles County jail after serving only three days of a 45-day sentence for a probation violation stemming from a previous alcohol-related reckless driving case.

Why was this the most important news of that day? Think about it: Subtract the time for commercial announcements, and at best, three minutes remain for news. This bit of pop-culture nonsense ate up a minute of what was left. A Rusty Saber topic was born.

Why was I even aware that Hilton was in jail? I live in America; I know more than I ever wanted to know about her. For some puzzling reason, this reasonably attractive heiress, whose only perceptible talent seems to be just showing up, is constantly at the vortex of media hoopla.

The news report of Hilton’s “get out of jail free” card was only the beginning. For the remainder of the day, she was the day’s news, with nonstop coverage.

Even Rev. Al Sharpton, who never met a TV camera he didn’t like, appeared on camera speaking his mind about the injustice of her release. David Letterman and Jay Leno turned their gag writers loose coming up with Hilton jokes.

No sooner was she out of jail than the judge who originally sentenced her ordered her returned to his courtroom in handcuffs. “Unbelievable” was my only thought while watching the TV coverage of the news helicopters circling above the army of photographers making like the running of the bulls and chasing behind the police car carrying a weeping Hilton to the courthouse.

Talk of a dubious medical condition that may have caused the L.A. County sheriff to free the heiress went by the boards and a crying Hilton was sent back to jail.

It isn’t like Paris is alone in the eye of the storm of media coverage. Every act of singer Britney Spears is under ceaseless media scrutiny. Her earlier career successes were covered in minute detail. So too is every phase of her present career meltdown under the microscopic gaze of the media barons.

I can’t speak for anyone else, but I know a lot more about the apparent self-destruction of actress Lindsay Lohan than I have even a modicum of interest in knowing. I don’t believe I have ever seen the troubled star in anything; however, I seem to know a lot about her. I do hope she gets her life in order.

I don’t understand why Rosie O’Donnell is forever in the news. I certainly don’t understand the media fascination with the feud between Rosie and Elisabeth Hasselbeck. She and Rosie are feuding: Who cares?

For now, media will doubtless keep an eye trained on the jail holding Paris Hilton. Should she be released early, another Rusty Saber may be born.

Joe McAdoo is former chairman of the communication department of Drury University.