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Opinion: Avoiding feedback: The too easygoing boss makes matters worse

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Providing feedback is often like walking a tightrope – one wrong word can lead to defensiveness, misunderstandings or even strained relationships. Yet, sidestepping these uncomfortable conversations isn’t a viable solution.

Feedback isn’t just important; it’s essential. It’s a powerful catalyst for mutual trust, professional growth, team cohesion and organizational success. When managers shy away from constructive feedback, they miss opportunities to address blind spots, strengthen team dynamics and improve outcomes across their business.

Avoiding feedback doesn’t make problems disappear, it allows underlying issues to grow unchecked. During my four decades of consulting with leaders, I’ve repeatedly observed how the lack of effective feedback often leads to recurring business problems, diminishes goal urgency and lowers job satisfaction. The most significant consequence is the long-term impact of these unresolved issues on an organization’s ability to adapt and achieve ambitious goals.

Providing useful, timely feedback – whether critical or praiseworthy – relies on the manager’s communication skills and follow through. Here are five principles anyone can use.

1. Be specific and clear. Ambiguity undermines effective feedback. Managers may think they’re communicating clearly, but employees often perceive the message as vague. Phrases like, “You should know what I expect” aren’t actionable. Without clear details, employees might mistakenly think they’re meeting expectations, only to be blindsided if their performance leads to consequences.

Rather than saying, “I’m not happy with your work,” provide concrete examples. For instance, “The report was submitted two days late, and several sections were missing key data.” Specificity eliminates uncertainty and provides employees with a clear roadmap for improvement.

2. Be timely – don’t think it, say it. Waiting too long to deliver feedback can lead to costly fallout. One manager I coached saved all his feedback for the annual review. Throughout the year, he refrained from addressing areas for improvement and didn’t give appreciation or praise either. This left his team in the dark about expectations and performance issues until it was too late to course correct. One of his brightest engineers grew increasingly frustrated with the lack of regular communication and she resigned.

By reinforcing what your employee is doing correctly, and addressing concerns early and constructively, you help employees improve and you build trust. If you think it, say it – just say it thoughtfully and well-timed.

3. Be intentional. Effective feedback isn’t something you deliver on a whim. A spur-of-the-moment reaction can create confusion or even demotivate your team.

For example, a CEO once emailed a VP, who worked only 30 feet away, stating, “If you can’t handle the responsibility I’ve given you, I may need to take it away.” The vague and poorly timed comment left the VP blindsided and demoralized and he eventually quit.

Deliver feedback with care and intention to prevent miscommunication and foster a stronger, more motivated team.

4. Support, don’t just criticize. Pointing out faults without offering solutions doesn’t help anyone grow. Effective feedback combines constructive criticism with coaching and actionable steps for improvement. Instead of saying, “You didn’t handle that client call well,” try, “During today’s client call, your response could have been more convincing. What can we do to help you next time?” Focus on the person’s growth and development rather than simply highlighting mistakes for better outcomes. As a general rule, spend 70% of your dialogue on the solution and 30% on the problem.

5. Rethink the sandwich method. The “sandwich method” of placing criticism between two compliments might seem like a good idea, but it can backfire.

This approach often feels insincere or confusing, as employees might only focus on the praise and miss the criticism entirely. For example, instead of saying, “You’re usually very creative, but your presentation missed the mark, it’s no big deal ... and I did love your slides’ graphics though,” opt for something they can act on for improvement. Try saying, “Your presentation needed more data to back up the recommendations. Can you add those next time?” Use specificity if you want constructive criticism to be understood.

Avoiding feedback often makes matters worse. Providing beneficial feedback not only upskills and empowers people but also builds morale. Better results should follow.

Mark Holmes is a consultant, professional speaker and author of “Selling to ELON! Understand, Communicate and Sell to Unique Personality Types,” and he’s president of Springfield-based Consultant Board Inc. and SalesRevenueCoach.com. He can be reached at mark@salesrevenuecoach.com.

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