Know your audience before opening your mouth

Whether you are speaking at a round table, giving a formal presentation, or meeting one-on-one, the most important element in any presentation is this: Know your audience.

Without this key ingredient, you will make assumptions, speak above or below the level of your listener, or at worst, position yourself as inexperienced or un-sophisticated.

Here is a personal story that illustrates these points.

It was my first time to Norfolk, Va., and my first eastern workshop with Na-tional Speaker's Association. It's exciting to be among 400 or more speakers, some relatively unknown and others who are like celebrities.

National conventions can be intimidating, yet I always make the effort to be the first to speak and introduce myself. I pride myself on my networking abilities and always seek out people who look a little lost. I noticed one such gentleman after registering at the eastern workshop.

He was an average built, attractive man with a well-kept beard and conservative clothes. Honestly, he looked a bit nerd-ish, which I tend to admire: The quiet intelligent shy type, very left-brained. I sat down and introduced myself.

"Hi, my name is Marlene Chism."

"Ric Edleman," he said as he extended his hand.

We continued our small talk on the first level communication that tends to break the ice: Looking for commonalities and talking about the weather.

"Is this your first convention?" I asked.

"Yes," he answered.

"Well, I'm kind of green and don't know the big-dogs from the wannabes," I said, trying to be charming and witty.

"Well, by looking at the schedule, there isn't any one here of any status. Either that, or I don't have a clue," he chuckled.

"Well, I guess you don't have a clue!" I responded, assured of my superior knowledge.

Anyone in the speaking business who doesn't know Patricia Fripp or Nido Qu-bein is obviously from Mars. (I could tell by the way he laughed sheepishly that he recognized I'm not such a greenhorn' after all.)

Then we moved on to level two of conversation, fact disclosure: We started talking about our speaking topics. He speaks on financial planning and investing; my topic is communication and relationships. Just as I thought, he was my direct opposite. He was dressed in brown (boring) and I had on red (exciting). He seemed aloof, and I'm high strung.

I sympathized with him on how tough it is to make a dull subject interesting. I could tell by looking at him he was a little, well, boring, or perhaps dry is a better word. I sensed that he thought I was a tad flighty, but I was certain he appreciated me taking him under my wing, nonetheless.

Then I moved into level three conversation: Opinion giving. I told him how to be more interesting as I amused him with stories of how I occasionally tap-dance in motivational presentations. (Was he rolling his eyes when I said that or was that just a speck in his eye?)

He gave me his opinion about how I wasn't using QuickBooks efficiently. I told him about my audiotape that was almost finished and gave him guidance on how to use products as a way to leverage and negotiate.

Why were people staring at us?

Then out of the blue, one of the gawkers approached him, stuck out his hand and said, "Mr. Edleman, you are my hero," or something to that effect. I ob-served as they vehemently shook hands.

"I listen to your radio show every chance and I watch you on TV when I know you're on, and hey, man, I loved your last book!" his worshiper continued.

What? Radio show, TV, book? Who is this guy?

When I got home I looked at Mr. Edleman's Web site. It was a top-of-the-line Web site with financial calculators, testimonials from those who had read his New York Times bestseller, and information about his upcoming radio and TV appearances.

It dawns on me that Ric Edleman is a financial guru in Virginia, earning more on one engagement than many speakers make in a year, and on the fast track to "Oprah."

I tried to redeem myself by e-mailing him a compliment when I watched him on the "Oprah" show.

I asked him if he remembered me, to which he charmingly replied, "How could I forget someone as interesting as you?"

The moral of the story is: Know your audience before you open your mouth.

(Marlene Chism is the president of ICARE Presentations. She develops customized training for companies targeted to develop motivated, responsible employees.)