Intermission: High-dollar-box-office hopefuls on way to local theaters

Ready ... set ... Bust the block!!!

Hollywood's bread-and-butter season used to kick off on Memorial Day weekend. However, as the major studios pushing films with budgets measured in megadollars scramble for the paying audience, the time frame keeps getting pulled forward.

This year's evidence was the May 4 release of the summer's first high-dollar hopeful, "The Mummy Returns." While the first installment of what I shudder to think will become a franchise did great box office, any serious film fan can only wonder why a sequel was deemed to be in order.

Wait, what am I saying? The phrase "did great box office" explains it all.

Those who thought "The Mummy" (and I'm talking about the 1999 version) was mindless drivel should re-examine their position. Few movies come to mind that have less of a plot than "The Mummy Returns." Sure the special effects are wowie-zowie, but getting bludgeoned with a sledgehammer, even the most awesome looking sledgehammer ever made, tends to be painful. Wrestling fans will be delighted to know that Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson has a major role here. Let's hope this isn't a harbinger of the quality ahead.

Here are a few of the bigger things headed our way in the next few months:

"Pearl Harbor" If you've been to the movies lately, you no doubt have seen the previews for this. The "bombs eye view" shot looks great, but how many times has a preview shown the only good parts of a big movie? Too many. Directed by Michael Bay, who gave us the bombastic "Armageddon," "Pearl Harbor" with its fictionalized account of history as a backdrop for a poignant love story looks to be the "Titanic" of the South Pacific. It opens May 25.

"Moulin Rouge" Remember the latest "Romeo + Juliet?" The one that used the Bard's original words but looked like MTV on speed? I was surprised, but I actually enjoyed it. Director Baz Luhrmann is at it again, this time with a look at the famous Paris cancan club circa 1900. The twist here is, once again, the director's dizzying visual style and odd (for the period, anyway) musical choices. From a completely sexist point of view, Nicole Kidman will be wearing a cancan outfit. Opens May 18.

"A.I." Is it "Pinocchio" in the age of cyborgs? Another two-letter piece of high-tech sentimentality from the man who brought us "E.T?" Hard to say, but one point should be taken seriously: Steven Spielberg is doing this project after the death of no less a genius than Stanley Kubrick. Kubrick wasn't generally known for his feel-good fluff pieces, and he was interested in making this film for a long time.

Haley Joel "I See Dead People" Osment stars as a robot child who is abandoned by his human parents. Coming to his aid is a robotic grown-up, played by Jude Law. More than anything, the Kubrick connection has me excited about this. It opens June 29.

Does the world really need another mindless comedy from a former "Saturday Night Live" star? Wasn't "Deuce Bigelow: Male Gigolo" punishment enough? Apparently not, as Rob Schneider returns in "The Animal." The story is a Frankenstein sort of affair with some of the parts used to make the man coming from animals. Who knows, if he has a chimp's brain, maybe this character will be smarter than "Deuce Bigalow." Teens will be shocked next year when "The Animal" is snubbed at the Oscars. It opens June 1.

What Hollywood season would be complete without a few rehashes, er, I mean remakes?

The most promising may well be Tim Burton's retelling of the 1968 classic "Planet of the Apes." Burton, from "Pee Wee's Big Adventure" to "Batman" to "Edward Scissorhands," has always had a great eye for art direction, so this remake is bound to look fantastic. One of the key scenes from the original, the one where Charlton Heston (clutching his rifle and NRA card) sees the Statue of Liberty buried in the sand and realizes what planet he's really on, won't be here this go round as the story takes place somewhere other than Earth. It opens July 27.

"Rollerball," released in 1975, told the tale of blood sport in a twisted world of the future. They had no way of knowing just how bloodthirsty the real future would be. "Survivor" and "Weakest Link" are the latest examples. The new "Rollerball" opens Aug. 24.

Oh, good! Sequels! The titles should tell you all you need to know. "Dr. Doolittle 2," "Scary Movie 2," "Jurassic Park 3," "American Pie 2" and believe it or not, "Jason X," the 10th installment of the "Friday the 13th" franchise.

Finally, one full-blown re-release. Francis Ford Coppola's epic masterpiece "Apocalypse Now" will wrap up the season Aug. 31. With nearly an hour's worth of added footage, the film will clock in at about 3 1/2 hours. My guess is, even 22 years after its first release, this will be the finest 3 1/2 hours of film we'll see all summer.

(Jim Wunderle works at Associated Video Producers and is a Springfield free-lance writer and musician.)