Guest Column: Work-life balance a juggling act

Ted is her talented attorney-husband, who also has hit his career stride. Both of them want a family and a house. With hard work, patience and diligence, everything is possible, right?

Unfortunately, reality has hit Mary and Ted hard. They work long hours and barely have time to eat together, much less time to talk about their hopes for the future.

Does this situation sound familiar?

Mary and Ted know they must find some kind of resolution before their marriage and livelihoods are compromised. Mary, a great multitasker, has started looking into different kinds of resources, like getting some help around the house. Ted starts asking friends and colleagues about social activities that he and Mary can share in.

Finally! The situation is on its way to being resolved.

What can you do to improve your own life circus? Here are some tips to finding more peace and less chaos in your schedule:

1. Take care of yourself. Are you being accountable for your own care? Not just physical, because mental and emotional health are important, too. When was the last time you saw your doctor, got a haircut or went to the gym? Create a list and start making a change for the better. Get involved with community service, find a church or social organization to build relationships. Eat right, exercise, reduce your stress levels and find time to socialize and renew old friendships. Take up new hobbies or renew your interest in old ones. You can even go online and connect.

2. Outsource your household duties. You can start off by calling a cleaning service. Hiring someone to help with chores could reduce your workload and give you more time for things you actually enjoy. Many companies offer different kinds of support personnel to perform dusting, mopping, cleaning, laundry and even some light shopping. You can even hire someone on a weekly or monthly basis. Don’t feel guilty about it, either. Everyone needs extra help at one point or another.

3. Hire someone for your outside chores. Mowing the grass, cleaning up the yard and doing household repairs can take up a lot of spare time, even if they’re done during the weekend. If you want to spend more time with loved ones or friends, or even find time for the hobbies you once loved doing, look into a yard service or hire a neighborhood kid to help.

4. Review your job responsibilities. You may be spending extra time on duties that could easily be passed on to an assistant or secretary. If there isn’t already a support staff in place, confer with your boss or supervisor to see if there is a budget to hire someone for this kind of help. Review your job on a regular basis, and assess where you want to be.

5. Work with your colleagues. When you offer to help your co-workers with their client accounts and projects, don’t feel guilty about asking for their help when you need it. If you are taking on more tasks and projects than you can handle, not only can this backfire with your boss, it can negatively affect those around you, such as your colleagues and clients. Know your limits ahead of time; if there is a huge project that needs to be finished in a week, plan ahead and ask for help when necessary.

6. Review your remaining household duties. Consult with your partner or spouse about the jobs you prefer doing and make a list of who does what. Talk weekly about how the plan is working and whether it needs to be tweaked.

7. Make time for the important stuff. Set goals for both work and personal fulfillment, and consult with your spouse or partner. Ted and Mary already are planning on a second honeymoon in Europe and they’ve even talked about their plans for a family.

Nancy D. O’Reilly, Psy.D., is a clinical psychologist, researcher and founder of www.womenspeak.com. She is author of the forthcoming “Timeless WomenSpeak About Feeling Youthful At Any Age” and hosts the radio program “Timeless WomenSpeak.” She can be reached at drnancy@womenspeak.com.