Bloody vampire flick needs major transfusion

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"Queen of the Damned"|ret||ret||tab|

Directed By: Michael Rymer|ret||ret||tab|

Starring: Stuart Townsend, Aaliyah, Lena Olin|ret||ret||tab|

Rated: R|ret||ret||tab|

At the end of "Queen of the Damned," the screen says the film is dedicated to the memory of Aaliyah, who stars in the lead role. The pop-singer-turned-actress made a splash with audiences in her first film, "Romeo Must Die" and she looked poised to broaden her career as an ac-tress. Tragically, she died last year at age 22 in a small plane crash. Sadder still is the fact that her final acting role was in a film that is boring at best and barely scratches the surface of Aaliyah's obvious talents. Although she's in the title role, her screen time is short and the film would be more aptly titled, "Lestat: Vampire Rocks!" (Or maybe "Dude, Where's My Coffin?")|ret||ret||tab|

Moviegoers have been fascinated with the vampire for as long as there have been movies; F.W. Murnau's 1922 film "Nosferatu" is still considered a milestone in cinema, Tod Browning's "Drac-ula" from 1931 made the vampire a part of modern culture. When one thinks of a vampire, one sees the image of Bela Lu-gosi as the Transylvanian count. In the 1960s, England's Hammer Films cranked out a series of Dracula films with Christopher Lee in the title role. More recently Frances Coppola gave us "Bram Stoker's Dracula" while director Neil Jordan tackled the popular Anne Rice series of novels with "Interview with the Vampire."|ret||ret||tab|

It's from this series director Michael Rymer culls his "Queen of the Damned." Whereas Jordan's film was a pretty serious piece of work albeit based on a pop culture novel Rymer's slant on things is campy, and draws inspiration more from the likes of Marilyn Manson and KISS than from "Nosferatu" or "Dracula."|ret||ret||tab|

The time is the present and we learn, through an overly long-winded voice over that comes and goes throughout the film, that the vampire Lestat, weary of the world, has been sleeping in his coffin for a hundred and some odd years. He decides it's time to get up. The world is a much different place than it was when he went to bed. In what appears to be a downward career move, Lestat joins a rock band and boldly tells the world he is indeed a real vampire. Rock fans have been hearing this sort of thing since the days of Screamin' Jay Hawkins, Alice Cooper, Ozzy Osborne and Marilyn Manson. That's showbiz.|ret||ret||tab|

The kids dig it though and before long Lestat is a MAJOR rock star, even bigger than the other king of the "undead," Elvis. Even if the fans don't take his vampire act as fact, the other vampires around the world, and there apparently are many, get a bit ticked off about his "coming out." They don't want any un-due attention it makes it harder to feed. |ret||ret||tab|

Arriving on the scene also is Marius, who made Lestat a vampire lo those many centuries ago. Marius tells Lestat to cool it, that the other bloodsuckers are bound to get mad and vampire revenge is an ugly affair. |ret||ret||tab|

Marius reminds Lestat of the biggest threat: The mother of all vampires, Queen Akasha who has been living as a statue for centuries on end may get so riled she'll decide to come back. Even vampires are afraid of this babe, who drank Egypt dry during her reign. Come back she does and she gets the hots for Lestat. |ret||ret||tab|

Also vying for Lestat's affections is Jesse, a young woman with vampire in her family history, who wants to gain immortality. The irony is that Lestat is enamored with the human condition, tired of the loneliness of being a bloodsucking freak who will never die.|ret||ret||tab|

Things come to a head in the ludicrous concert scene. Lestat has decided to throw a show in Death Valley (where else?). A crowd bigger than the one at Woodstock shows up for the event. It just happens. There doesn't seem to be any promoters, roadies, ticket takers, fences, restrooms, concession stands...|ret||ret||tab|

On hand are various members of the vampire community, all hell-bent on si-lencing Lestat once and for all.|ret||ret||tab|

Queen Akasha, enamored still with her vampire boy toy, has other plans. Being the most powerful of the vampires, she does away with most of the attackers in short order. The fans think this is the grooviest show EVER.|ret||ret||tab|

With her new king by her side, Queen Akasha plans on beginning her new kingdom and sets about to suck the world dry once more. Lestat realizes she's evil (really evil) and with the help of Maharet, who is to vampires what Glenda the good witch was to witches in "The Wizard of Oz," he decides to do the human race a favor. |ret||ret||tab|

The film makers could have done us all a favor and kept this mess in the can. It's not as awful as, say, "Battlefield Earth," and may even warrant a watching for the sheer "hoot" factor when released on video. But for a real vampire experience, stick with the classics. |ret||ret||tab|

(Jim Wunderle works at Associated Video Producers and is a Springfield free-lance writer and musician.)[[In-content Ad]]