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Opinion: Still giving thanks after digesting Thanksgiving?

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As the commercialism of Thanksgiving fades into the commercialism of Christmas (or whatever we’re allowed to call it these days), several thoughts have occurred to me that will impact you as a person, a salesperson and in your business.

People try so hard to express good cheer in these holiday seasons that they often miss the mark. “Don’t eat too much turkey!” or “Don’t drink too much eggnog!” are ways of saying, “I have nothing new to say.”

My bet is that your “thank you” is somewhat like your mission statement; it’s there, but it’s relatively meaningless, and no one can recite it. (Most employees, even executives, cannot recite their own mission statement, even under penalty of death.)

Here are the hard questions to ask:

• Why is this only the season we give thanks?

• How sincere is your message, really?

• Why do you find it necessary to thank your customers at the same time everyone else is thanking their customers?

• If you’re thanking people, what are you offering besides words to show that you value and care them?

• Why do you have a shiny card with a printed message and foil-stamped company signature – and nothing personal?

Here’s my idea: Why not start by thanking yourself? Thank yourself for your success, health, family, attitude, knowledge, fun times, friends and all the cool things you do that make you a happy person.

If you’re having trouble thanking yourself, that’s an indicator things aren’t going very well. And in that situation any thanks you give to others will be perceived somewhere between less than whole and totally insincere.

I don’t think you can become sincerely thankful to others until you have become fully thankful to yourself and for yourself. And once you realize who you are, your message of thanks will become much more real and passionate to others.

The good news: This is a holiday. The bad news: It’s so full of retail shopping incentives, mobs of people and “today only deals” that the festivity of Thanksgiving gets lost in the shuffle.

Black Friday and Cyber Monday – or is it Cyber Tuesday, or Small-business Saturday or Throwback Thursday? Whatever it is, it’s a strategy for advertising and promoting. And I’m OK with it, totally OK with the free enterprise system; I just think the hype of it has become more dominant than the giving of thanks.

Call me old-fashioned, but I don’t think you can call me wrong. I want our economy to be strong but not at the expense of celebration, family time and personal time to thank yourself for who you have become and who you are becoming.

If you didn’t already do something similar at Thanksgiving, try this: Sit around the dinner table with family and friends and have each person make a statement as to what they are grateful for and who they are grateful to. Then have them say one thing about themselves that they are thankful for.

This simple action will create a sense of reality around your table that will be revealing and educational. It also wipes away all the superficial talk often associated with family holidays.

Why not ask people to recall their best Thanksgiving ever, the person they miss the most or the most important thing they’ve learned as a family member, and to just be thankful.

Back to you. Make a list of your best qualities – not your money or property – those personal assets you possess that you believe have created the person you are. List your humor, friendliness, helpfulness, approachability, trustworthiness, honesty, ethics and maybe even your morality. (Tough list, eh?)

And as you head deeper into this holiday season perhaps next year’s intentions and focus (not goals and resolutions) will be more about building assets and capabilities you can be thankful for and grateful for.

For those of you wondering, “Where’s the sales tip?” Wake up and smell the leftovers. I’m trying to help you sell you on yourself. Once you make that sale and become the best you can be for yourself, then it is easy to become the best you can be for others, and present yourself in a way that others will buy.

It’s the holiday baby, go out and celebrate yourself. Go ahead and thank yourself.

 

Jeffrey Gitomer, author of “The Little Red Book of Selling” and 11 other titles, is president of Charlotte, N.C.-based Buy Gitomer. He gives seminars, runs annual sales meetings and conducts Internet training programs on sales and customer service at Gitomer.com. He can be reached at salesman@gitomer.com.

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